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08/08/2002 entry: "In need of serious help"

Okay, I never talked about what happened after TMBG, did I? Well, it involves spiders. Many spiders.

First of all, I'm really afraid of spiders. ARACHNIPHOBIA. When I see spiders (or bees or snakes) I run and scream. Although spiders I will kill, if I have to. Kill them dead. But I'm so incredibly afraid of them.

Well, that night after the concert Kevin and I went to a restaurant. There are two main places to park.. right by the entrance there are like 8 or so spots, and then a slightly bigger lot farther back, near houses or something. Well we brought a little something back with us, I think. Because as I was pulling out, we noticed a couple of spiders on my car. One on the windshield which I promptly killed with wipers, then one I saw by my OPEN window (immediately closed it) and one ON Kevin's window which disappeared, and ended up INSIDE the car later. When we got back to my house, Kevin got out of the car and killed a couple more. He thought maybe they came from the tree in front of my house, I thought they came from whatever yard we parked by. In any case, some got on his car. Yay.

Since then, I've found a bunch more. We killed at least 5 more in an IHOP parking lot Monday night. I just killed two tonight before I left Kevin's house. This is NOT cool. I'm hoping there isn't some sort of nest somewhere... Because I'd probably just throw my car off a cliff to be honest.

Although, they don't seem to get INSIDE the car. Mostly outside.

Which is why as soon as I can, I'm getting a hose and spraying every inch of my car. Probably tomorrow during the day. They don't come out during the day. Just at night. So maybe I'll wash them away?

My dad says he knows the kind of spiders though. They're harmless. Probably just garden spiders or something. He said we get them in the house, mostly in the summer. Not a whole lot, but enough to notice I guess. Well, I told him, they apparently really like my car.

Funny thing is, neither of my parents have noticed said spiders on/in their cars. Strange.

But, I'm no longer parking underneath that tree.

And in trying to learn more about what to do about spiders, I started reading all this stuff about Brown Recluses and Black Widows. Not that they're common around here. Mostly in Southern Illinois I think. But they can live around here I suppose.

People rarely die from getting bit by one of those, but it seems like a rather nasty experience.

Now I keep feeling itchy and sensitive all over. I keep thinking, what if a spider is right here and I don't see it? What if one's in my hair? What if one's in my clothes? Or crawling on me at night? Questions only an arachniphobe would ask.

Thank milton the spiders on my car are relatively small and stupid. They seem to not do anything but mill around and secrete web stuff. But they still, must go. They can live wherever they want, just as long as it's not anywhere near me or anywhere I might ever go. Because if they do, squash squash squash. I hate hate hate bugs. Crawling things. Flying things. Biting things.

I even hate ladybugs, because at school we get crazy aggressive Ninja ladybugs that BITE. And are all over the fucking place. Which reminds me, I have that to go back to. Oh yay. They fucking swarm around doorways. And bite. Oh, I said that. Well, it's annoying. And hurts.

Okay I have to go to bed. I'm getting up in 6 hours to go eat breakfast with my family before they go to the zoo. And before I flood out all spiders living on my car. Please please please let this work. Or else I'll have to write a letter to John Goodman begging him to come and kill all the spiders.