may 28, 2003
I find it to be unbelievably true that each day is not truly replicated ever again.
It's kind of comforting, too.
In any case, today has proved my point.
Amazing, isn't it? That I actually have a story for once, something interesting to say?
Sure it's nothing monumental. But hell, I think it's cool.
I was working in Reserves at the library, getting books together for a student. During that time, the sky had suddenly gone from somewhat sunny to very very very dark. The tornado sirens went off, and everyone had to crowd into this little room in the basement for about 15-20 minutes.
I heard a couple of things. First, that funnel clouds had been spotted in the area. Second, someone was told via cell phone that there had been a tornado sighting around 75th and.. some other street. But to put this in perspective..
1) Around here, the numbered streets run east to west (generally). So going south, the numbers go up.
2) The main street running by the school is called Chicago Ave, but is technically 55th St.
Put the pieces together, and that's 20 streets south of us.
Meanwhile, I'm stuck in the basement when what I'd really like to be doing is standing out in front of the library watching the storm. They said it started hailing too. My dad likes to do that... stand out on our front porch at home when there are particularly bad storms. Ones where the sky turns colors. I like that too. We're just asking to get sucked up into a tornado, but I don't care.
Finally we're allowed to go back upstairs.. but lo, what's that? Someone smells smoke.
So we go upstairs and outside (where it's raining) while the fire truck shows up. We actually went across the street to one of the academic buildings where there was a sort of.. covering over a part of the sidewalk in front. Finally we get to go back in, and look! I only have a half hour left in my shift.
Interesting stuff.
You know what the best part is?
It's supposed to storm again later tonight. I heard at 8pm, but I'm thinking more like by 8pm. I wish it was going to be as bad as earlier, but I think it's only going to be a typical thunderstorm. Which I love anyhow, but I really wanted to see that insane storm going on earlier. I'm just asking for trouble.
I'm a little.. drained? Maybe just not as "up" as I could be. Otherwise I'd be a little more enthusiastic than just this. I am more enthusiastic, somewhere in here, but I have my reasons for being a tiiiny bit bummed. Which is somewhat related but not really. You follow? No? Good.
That's my day thus far.
P.S., when livejournal.com gets back up and running, just go there for journal entries (livejournal.com/users/ihateusernames/). This was just a once-in-a-blue-moon post in here.
posted by rachel
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may 19, 2003
Hmm.
You should probably just go to
my livejournal.
I've been posting in there tons more.
posted by rachel
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may 10, 2003
I feel like a tornado just passed through my brain.
Today has been.. busy. Consistently so. I have driven so much today.
So, one of the first things I hear from my Dad in the car on the way home is,
"You're grandpa's in the hospital, he got dizzy again"
"Hmm. Okay."
"Your uncle's also in the hospital, he got pneumonia or something and things haven't been going good. They're not sure what's going to happen."
"WHAT?"
Let me explain for a second. My uncle was diagnosed with a type of lung cancer (not the typical kind, a different kind). So indirectly through radiation treatments, he got pneumonia and is on oxygen at the hospital. Tomorrow for Mother's Day, we're going out to lunch and then going to visit him.
I tried so hard not to cry in the car on the way home. I was successful. But if something happens...
We all knew he had cancer and we knew that something bad COULD happen. But the thing is, you don't seriously consider it until it actually does happen.
Overall it wasn't necessarily a bad day, it's just that the one bad thing was REALLY bad.
I had such a good morning. Up until 1:30pm or so I was in a great mood. I think I successfully kept myself fairly happy throughout the day, being busy and chattering away at my sister. The thing is, I always come back to THAT.
I guess I technically have a story to tell, but I think I'll wait to tell it. It was something I remembered earlier this morning that made me really happy. But I don't feel like typing all that much right now. I'll save it.
posted by rachel
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Tonight was a relatively good day. Granted, class and work weren't fun (as usual). But other than that...
For one thing, I got a financial aid summary. And... if everything works out the way it says on there, my entire next year will be paid for through various grants/scholarships and a couple loans. Lovin' it.
For another, I found out Chris has another screenname today.. I had no idea. But we actually got to have a nice long conversation, which tends to be rare during the week for various understandable and unavoidable reasons.
Then, Sarah called me and we went to Bakers Square for dinner in her family's convertible. Good food. REAL food. Grilled Chicken Primavera = very very good. The green peppers were excellent.
Afterwards, we drove out to Bridgeview to get Sara and Nia. The following few sentences might be confusing, but bear with me and pay attention to spelling. So, Sarah got to see Sara's house and met Sara's dad. Mr. Aurich seemed to love her. Probably because she's so friendly and was interested in the remodeling they were doing in the kitchen. But I talked with him a bit about my family and all that.
One funny thing, is when Sarah and I got there, Sara wasn't there yet. But I just went into the house and was asking people "Where's Sara?" because I can. I even asked Sara when she got there, "If I just showed up at your house at any given time without warning, would your family even give it a second thought?" "No, that's true." See? I'm like an extra cousin.
From there, we put the convertible top down and made a run to a gas station blaring B96-y, hip-hop / dance music and acting retarded. Then it was off to El-Mar Bowl for some good old fashioned bowling-fun. And there was hardly anyone there! We only played one game, they each had one drink, and then we had to leave cause everyone had to get up early the next day.
Much love to Sarah for driving so much.
The only not-so-fun part of the evening was me, without a drink. Watching them all drink. Bahh. Oh well, I dealt with it.
But overall, today was a fairly good day. Indeed!
And tomorrow will certainly be full, if not also good. Home, gift-shopping, thrifting, drinking (hopefully), maybe even coffee with Sara if she would like. Website work, most likely. Homework, if I make myself.
Lots of errands to run and things to get done this weekend. But that's alright. I can't complain too much, it keeps me busy.
But that about sums up the current state of things, so I think I'm going to play a bit of Dynomite on Shockwave.com, pack up some shit for tomorrow, and go to bed. I have work tomorrow at 11am.
posted by rachel
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may 9, 2003
Once there was this very confused girl. She had good friends, her whole life ahead of her and things that made her happy. Most of the time. She wasn't happy all the time, because of how confused she was about one particular thing. There was something she wanted, or at least wanted to try, but the path in that direction was hazy and seemingly full of obstacles. An echo of her mother's incessant worrying, she could only think- "What if I start that way, and then suddenly I find out it's completely blocked off? What if something happens to me along the way? What if I get lost? What if I get hurt?"
So every day, this girl would stand out in front of her house and look at the paths set out before her. She knew that sometimes two paths can eventually lead to the same thing, but of course she also was smart enough to know that you don't find that out for sure until you've already made your decision.
The second path that could lead her in the desired direction was easier to see, but in that clarity she saw the roughness of the road, the hiking, the struggling- and knew she would need patience and strength to go that way.
Then one morning, the girl had an idea. What if she could break the rules and make her own path? Cut through the woods in the generally right direction and just hope she was cunning and brave enough to make it. What would happen along the way? She had no idea. But at least when things happened, she could make her own decisions instead of sticking to a pre-set path.
You see, no matter which path she chose, she still didn't know what was going to happen and when things were going to happen. She'd never know how close or far she was until she got there. At least if she was making her own decisions, she could say she really did it. That the greatness of getting where she wanted to be was all her own doing, and no one else's.
----
I am so weird.
I'm also having issues with how mature people perceive me as being. For some reason, I somewhat get the impression that people still see me as.. a teenager or something. Maybe that's just the result of a certain state of mind I've had all my life in which I envision everyone I've known since I was a kid as much younger than they are.
But to be frank, I'm getting sick of it. SICK. BAH! I have no idea how to even express it at this point, really.
Just whatever you do, if you talk to me, don't talk down to me in any way... not that people do it intentionally... or at all, really... I'm just saying. I may launch into a "WHAT THE FUCK...?" rant. I realize I'm not the most responsible and mature person in the world, however I sometimes feel like some people don't give me enough credit. Er, that they underestimate me or something. Perhaps it's justified and I'm just fooling myself, as usual.
If so, then I have some work to do.
Until I figure that out, I'm going to bed.
posted by rachel
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may 8, 2003
Which Donnie Darko character are you? by Shay
Neat quiz. Better than shit like, "what sexual position are you?" or.. whatever the most trendy quiz is this week.
posted by rachel
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But I was all rant-y! Then Michelle IM'd me and-
Miss Shelley P: and yes, you have rubbed off on me quite a bit
Miss Shelley P: i have a fairly extensive bikini kill and mates of state mp3 collection
Miss Shelley P: btw, love the new icon
Rachels storm: thanks :-) yes, my evil plan is working, i am corrupting you bwahaha
Miss Shelley P: excellent
I don't remember the last time I said "bwahaha". Wow.
I.... wish I could say I was going to bed, but honestly, I don't see it happening soon. Maybe in the next hour.
posted by rachel
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Silly post before, serious post now.
Tonight Sarah and I were talking about life. How we wish everything could just be good, that we could be happy all the time. She actually asked me if I thought people would like her more if she didn't talk so much, or if she was different. Personally, I don't see how anyone wouldn't like her. I think she's a fantastic person and her openness and friendliness makes her more approachable than most.
Maybe not many people appreciate that. But, I at least enjoy being around people who are that friendly. And I find that I'm more comfortable talking to people who are so open like that. I guess I'm not really that type of person, and maybe that's why I like it so much? Not that all of my friends are like that. But everyone has different traits that make me care about them and enjoy being in their presence. One of Sarah's is that she cares about others and is very open.
For example. My other friend Sara isn't as open and friendly and quite frankly, crowds make her uncomfortable. But she's still amazing. She's really creative, she's driven and strong and she has a good heart. But she's also not afraid to express other emotions, like anger and depression. She's just... very strong. She makes me feel strong when I'm around her. We don't have very self-motivating skills, but when we get together and start planning we get eachother excited about the plan.
Then there's Nia, our third partner in crime. She's just insane, but in a good way. She doesn't care if anyone around thinks she's crazy for what she's doing. She has this high energy that's kind of infectious. She's also very honest.
I'm not going to make this list of my friends here, I just wanted to give some examples. I think, with all the people I'm friends with, there is just something about them that's almost indescribable. At some point during the friendship, something clicked and something meaningful happened and that's what makes me care about them. No matter how long I've known them. There was just some... moment where I felt something, some kind of connection. Something that made a small part inside me glow. Something that always glows when I'm around them or talking to them.
I know this started in one direction and went off in another... but, one of the things Sarah and I talked about was taking things for granted. And if I keep reminding myself how lucky I am to know the people I do, maybe I won't take things for granted so often. No one is ever 100% happy, and I believe there is nothing in this life that comes easy AND brings lasting happiness. You have to work for everything. That happiness will only be fleeting if something falls in your lap. If you take things for granted. I know, it happened to me.
About 8 months ago, last September, I was on top of the world. I was back at school, I had Kevin, I got a web design job, my birthday was coming up, everything was going great with my friends and shit, my classes were interesting... and for about a WEEK, I was happy. Then I crashed. And as I said to Sarah earlier, everything crashed around me. Thank god I had Michelle and Sara there for me. But that's my point, when things seem magical and happy and "too good to be true", be suspicious. Because it's not going to last. If you want it to last, you have to work your ass off.
To be cliched, there's no such thing as a free lunch.
That week was probably the happiest I had ever been. In my entire life, or at least as far as I could remember. But it didn't last and I know why. I've had my good and bad times since then. I'm looking to grab me a few more good times in the near future. Because if I put effort into it, that happy lit-up feeling feels that much better and has that much more power.
Life will never be easy without consequences. It's going to be hard, and you'll have to struggle and cry and be enraged and bored sometimes. Most of the time. And you know what? The only thing you can do about it is say, "Well, I'll just deal with it." Not in every case, but let's face it, sometimes that really is your only option. Other times, there are more options. Options where you get to fucking do something about it, and change your life for the better. And dammit, take that chance when you get it or else I'm going to come after you. Seriously.
Above all, don't be an idiot. Be aware, be conscious of things. Don't blind yourself. Let's say there's something you want. Something you at least know you want to try. Now, you can either go for it head on, or you can be patient and look around for the right opening, the right time. If you're looking at that head on, "go for it" road, TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT IT. Are there serious, important obstacles? Ones you can't do anything about at all? Rethink your impulse. Sometimes it's good to go for something like that, but other times you're going to make a fool of yourself. And if the waiting game doesn't turn out, you still have that option of going for it regardless of obstacles.
I tend to be impatient- very much so. But I'm also observant and highly cautious. Unfortunately I worry unnecessarily most of the time. But then again, if I didn't, how many more times in my life would I have done something stupid?
I should probably try to stop myself here, but it's awfully hard when I get started. And when there's no one responding to what I'm saying. It's just so easy to keep talking and talking.
I think one of the most important things I've learned in the past few months is to really pay attention to what people say to you. Sometimes there could be a hidden message there that they don't know they're relaying. Like, when someone says, "A lot can change in a year" or, "Stuff like that always happens when you're not looking". Though, the second one technically is in limbo right now and is awaiting jinxification. But the first one,.. yeah, if someone says that to you, Get Ready. I'm dead serious.
I really should sleep now. This is a lot to think about. I always have a lot to think about. I need to think less.
AND WHY DO I KEEP GETTING ALL THIS FUCKING SPAM?? Good grief!
Why can't I come home from class/work, or wake up in the morning and find a real email for once? An email that makes me smile and start (or finish) the day off happy, instead of just being pissed about all the junk I get?
I'm tired of why's, choking on why's
Just need a little because, because.
posted by rachel
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may 7, 2003
I am forever grateful to VH1's top 100 one-hit wonders. It got me out of whatever down-time I was feeling. Not depressed, just not... up as much as I was. But damn, who knew something so simple could help me feel better? And something so ridiculous too.
Okay, well, it wasn't necessarily the show itself that did it. It was more one of the songs they had on it. Remember "She Blinded Me with Science"? Thomas Dolby? Yeah. Uh.. well it's not so much... the SONG as it is the video. Err.. particular parts of the video. Ummm.. I feel so weird admitting this, but you know how in the video Dolby has those round glasses on, sometimes slipped down to the end of his nose so his eyes are kind of looking over them? I don't really know why, but something about that particular look made me go "WHOA." Haha I'm laughing at myself over this, I'm so weird.
But, that's what kind of... lifted my mood. Hahaha. Being turned on by a very specific image of Thomas Dolby. Hahahaha. What the fuck? That's what I say. What the fuck.
Just don't know what to do with myself.
All I know, is I am so so weird. I totally need to calm myself down, here. Wow. Hahaha. I can't stop laughing at myself. I guess this is a good thing?
Oh yeah, and my paper's done. Yayyy. But that top 100 one hit wonders was pretty good. Lots of really cool 80's songs.
So much stuff to do. So much procrastination.
posted by rachel
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I don't really feel like writing much tonight, but you know how I am. Once I start..
Let's start with some news. Due to some circumstances, Kevin is now coming back home and staying. He has to make one more trip out to where he was to get his stuff. But, he's going to be around. We're talking about doing some sort of pizza night sometime in the near future, which will be nice because I haven't had one of those in a while! I miss Hungry Howie's pizza.
Sarah and I are talking about taking a little trip some weekend to visit a friend of mine, Chris. Things aren't solidly planned yet, everyone is checking schedules and previous engagements. I'm hoping we'll get to do it before the end of the term, but that'll only happen if Sarah has a free day on some weekend that's not this one or the next one. But, that's something that I sincerely hope will come about in the near future.
I'm definitely going to the Foo Fighters show at the UIC Pavilion with my former roommate, Michelle. I don't use the word ex- in front of it, cause ex- sounds bad. We just aren't roommates anymore due to certain things that came up for her. But we still talk and we have classes together, and I'm glad we are occasionally getting the chance to hang out. She's one of those people I've met here that makes the 3 years and counting worth it.
Other news?... hmm, I don't think so. Oh, well I'm going on a field trip to the Art Institute on Monday. That should be fun. Although, by the time we get back I'll only have an hour or so before I have something else I have to go to. But that's alright, it'll be fun.
Still working on my music. Still working for the art department, the website is coming along. My next project is to do some facility tours using Flash. Which reminds me, I have to check if I still have that free trial. Or if I can somehow get another one. Still looking for a summer job.
---
I have a particular affliction that demands all of my attention
So I will pull away for fear of giving far too much
I have only these few bits of myself that I've collected
And to offer it all would be quite a mistake.
But sometimes that's the risk I have to take
And maybe that's the only way people reciprocate.
There is poetry in life and I have it in my sights
So I'll fire this flare gun into the air
That someone might come running to the light.
The sky opens up, screams and grumbles in pain
Through the window I'm whispering, "How wonderful is rain?"
One track minds soaked in one-way weather
Bathed in the sense of that moment forever.
I perform tricks with mirrors,
I fool myself for need of terrors
When the heart beats out an earthquake
And hot lava flows into the face.
---
That just sort of... happened. Hmm. Walks calm my mind a bit and help things flow. That's interesting. And, quite neat as well.
And now, I think it's that time. (Bedtime).
posted by rachel
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may 5, 2003
Some questions have been removed because they were terrible or stupid and I didn't want to bother answering them.
1. What's your real name? Rachel Ann Hoover
2. What's your favorite nickname? Mine: Rach, or Rachi-poo (Thanks Sara..) Other people's: SEXPOT! (Hahaha...)
6. Do you like the rain? Depends. In general, I'd say yes. But not if I have to walk extensively in it. I especially like it when accompanied by thunder and lightning, and I can open my windows and watch/listen to it as I fall asleep.
7. Have you ever been in love? Yes'm.
9. What song best describes you? "I Don't Know What To Do With Myself", covered by the White Stripes, done originally by Burt Bacharach. Not the entire song, mostly just the title line. That's my life :) In both ways, good and bad.
13. When was the last time you cried? Just an hour or so ago, actually. Not that I cry every day, trust me it was for a legitimate reason. Well, a legitimate reason and because I'm such a girl sometimes.
15. When was the last time George Lucas made you want to cry? When hasn't he?
16. When you were a kid, did you ever break any bones? Not-so-amazingly, no. I did however, fuck up my back for life. Resulting in my newfound love of Naproxen.
17. When you were a kid, did you ever steal anything? I was a bad kid. Yes. I stole gum and horoscope scrolls from Dominick's all the time. And of course, there was the obligatory jewelry and makeup stealing during my teen years. The gum and scrolls were when I was like... 7. Yeah. It's a little weird.
23. If you were a cow, would you be white with black spots? If I were a cow, I'd be ceramic and in Sara's mom's kitchen.
25. What was the saddest moment in your life? Well, I don't know if this is THE saddest moment, but it's one not many people know about. It was when I accused my dad of not caring about his family (not like.. my family, his side of the family). I felt absolutely terrible and cried and cried because I really hurt my dad. And of course I said I was sorry and we made up and he's awesome so I'm glad we're cool now.
28. What color shoes are you wearing? Tan, white and black pen. I get bored sometimes...
33. What is your lucky number? I think either 3 or 9.
36. What's your favorite book? Good good question. I'd have to say... hmm. Well, I loved Carson McCuller's The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter, and I've read Isaac Asimov's I, Robot a billion times. Consider that my answer.
39. Who knows you the best? Everybody, whether they like it or not :) It's hard to pick shit like that. Sara's known me for 20 years, I'd say she'd take the prize. BUT.. Kevin knows me really well, Sarah knows me really well (and in such a short time..) and hell, my online friends know me pretty well too, at least the ones who have known me for at least a couple years, because I tell them EVERYTHING. I don't like leaving anyone out.
40. Who knows you the best "in the Biblical sense"? Oh goodness.
42. Describe yourself in one word. Curious
47. Are you a generous person? Yes, though I don't want it to sound like I'm bragging or anything... but I feel like I am. Buying people gifts is exciting to me. And if I'm able, I always offer to pay for something for friends who are less able.
49. Did you lie on this test? I think I'm incapable of lying online, it must be the radiation from this monitor that compels me to speak the truth. Uh oh, shit... I hope no one uses this against me... (or if anyone does use it against me, that it's for something I've been wanting to say but don't have the courage to, because that would be kind of neat. :D)
50. Did you lie on that last question? No- I mean... yes. I mean... aw, fuck. ( ;D)
posted by rachel
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may 4, 2003
As I'm writing this, it's storming terribly outside.
Usually, I would be at the window enjoying the thunder, rain and chaos.
Instead I feel like a reflection of it.
I have taken it in too deeply,
And it pours inside my stomach.
I'm choking on those dark, dark clouds.
I feel as though I want to apologize for something,
But on the other hand I shouldn't have to.
What a slow, queer feeling this is.
There's no real reason for it,
It's simply that from every high there must come a low.
And I suppose that's all there really is to say about it.
Except.. that perhaps I've misjudged my position.
I think I've put myself in the wrong place again,
And though putting myself in that possible right place
May require certain risks be taken..
It could be that it is the only way to cash in, so to speak.
Hmm. Intriguing.
It feels good to be home. I love hanging out with my friends, but sometimes you just want to stop and sit at home and go to sleep.
Sarah went out to the bars again tonight, which is cool. I got back late, so I'll have to hear her stories tomorrow. Sara and Nia came over around 9pm, and we went to downtown Chicago for a change. We went to the Pick Me Up cafe, because Sara had been expressing some desire to go there lately. Parking was HELL! And so was trying to find our way back to the car! Shit we almost got lost. And I get freaked out easily in Chicago, because it's very unfamiliar and everything. So here's me, walking kind of fast and totally focusing on not getting mugged or injured in any way. Not that we were in a bad neighborhood, we weren't really. I just don't trust any place at night, to be honest. I get a little nervous in Naperville, even.
But Nia and Sara were walking a little slow, I kept having to slow down for them. And Nia was being a tad goofy and kept stopping to check out flowers on trees. But, we found the car.
By that time, we had to go straight back because it was like 1am. So we went to Sara's house so Nia could get her car off the street before 2am, and Sara drove me back here. She's my hero for doing all that driving.
Nia finally got to see my room, she said it was cute :D It is. It's small, but it's enough for me. I can't necessarily have tons of people over in here, but I don't have that many friends anyways :)
Ugh, I don't feel so good. Damn that coffee at the cafe.. Ugh. It was called a Zombie, and it had 3 shots of espresso, 2 cups of coffee, and milk or something. Yeah. I always take places up on their challenges. I drank the Racehorse at the cafe here in downtown Naperville. I can't help it, I see the recipe with the most espresso in it and say, "I'll bet I can handle that." I guess I can, it's just my stomach can be fairly sensitive under certain conditions and my dinner tonight wasn't exactly the healthiest thing in the world.
It doesn't keep me up all night like it does with some people. The amount of caffeine in coffee represents how hard I will crash after the buzz comes. And I am crashed. Err.. yes.
Tonight has been incredibly interesting though. The past few days have been incredibly interesting in general, but haha yeah. I totally love my California friends, I miss this online-thang we've got going. Everytime I read one of their posts or comments I either smile like nobody's business or start laughing to an equal degree. I adore Kari too, I think I just place her in the California friends category cause she really should be out there :) So when I say that, I mean her too.
I'm sooo tired and have been typing sooo much and I want sleep soo bad. Mmmmmph.
may 3, 2003
That's it, I give up. I'm putting this in here just like everyone else. Fill it out if you feel so inclined, but remember I didn't make up these questions. So feel free to make a mockery of the survey system. But not me. I didn't do it. I just conform to LJ trends out of boredom.
[1]--> when and how did we meet:
[2]--> have you ever seen me with my shirt off:
[3]--> have you ever seen me cry:
[4]--> describe me in four adjectives:
[5]--> if we could spend a day together what would we do:
[6]--> have we ever gotten in a fight:
[7]--> if you could give me a present what would it be:
[8]--> would you hug me:
[9]--> what do you really think of me:
[10]--> have we ever kissed:
[11]--> has there ever been anything you wanted to tell me, but were scared to:
[12]--> wanna makeout:
[13]--> name one thing you dont like about me:
So, I was reading my Drugs and Behavior textbook earlier today, and they said they have Blood Alcohol Level calculators online that can tell you how many drinks it takes to get to a certain BAC percentage. So, if you're bored and want to find out exactly how many drinks to have in a row to get wasted... here you go.
Nothing special. Jussst a photo. I wasn't feeling very creative at the time.
may 2, 2003
Not that she'll necessarily see this, but it's there anyhow :) (reference to title)
Today was a weird day, physiologically and I suppose emotionally! I don't know, I seem to be stuck in high gear. I've had that anxious, on edge feeling all day. It's kind of good, but also kind of annoying because I think I almost / did have a panic attack at work. Like, my heart was beating kind of fast and hard, and I felt really tense and anxious.. yeah. I had to take many deep breaths.
BUT, here's some fun news. I saw Sarah outside Goldspohn today and she's like, "Hey! I thought I had asked you to come to dinner at my house tonight, but I guess I didn't! Want to come?" I had no idea she intended on asking, but that was nice :) I guess I am a little nervous about that, since I'll be at her house and meeting her family and everything. See, this is "Neurotic Rachel" who freaks out when she's placed in a new situation that isn't very familiar to her. Though, Sarah and her two roommates from last night will be there. I am looking forward to it though, don't mistake my anxiety for something bad. I'm just crazy :) I totally know how to get over it, I just have to go through some physical discomfort in the meantime.
The cure for my anxiety is to not think about it, and even at the last minute when my body's saying "DON'T DO IT I CAN'T HANDLE IT" I say, "Fuck you, I'm doing it anyhow. Go digest something." You know. Because it's my body talking. So..
But this should be fun. I'm wondering if other Sara will want to get together tonight, though I haven't heard anything about it from her. But I'll be back at about 8pm, cause Sarah and her roommates are going to the bars tonight. Which.. I can't do. Four months, people. 4 months.
I have a lot of homework to try and get done this weekend. So I most likely am not going home Saturday. Plus if Kevin's coming Sunday, I'd like to be here that day.
The problem is that if I go home Saturday, I'll get SHIT done, cause I never do my homework when I'm there. I regress into being a teenager and just drink mountain dew and play video games all day. Hehe.
Okay, I have to make a phone call and then hang around for a while waiting to hear from Sarah. Soo, I'll probably end up posting later tonight too, but this is it for now.
I had a fun night tonight. I went to visit Sarah at the front desk, and handed over her birthday present. She liked it :) I got her a card, put a small bouquet of silk flowers together and got her a Barnes and Noble gift card, cause she mentioned she wanted some books. Two of her roommate came to the desk to join us and they both read the card I got her, and they had the same reaction to it. They were like, "Ohhh that is so nice/cute!" Hehe I pick out good meaningful cards.
But yes, Sarah was super happy with the gift, and that's what's important. I love watching people open gifts I get them and the smile that comes over their face, etc. I like making people happy. It makes me happy. Everyone's happy. Happy happy happy.
But we had a ton of fun, just the four of us hanging out, talking. Sarah told this HILARIOUS story about her sister, I can't do it justice. You have to have her tell it, and it has to be in person. She is so animated and funny. We laughed so hard, you wouldn't believe it. Now me, I'm not that funny. Well... never when I intend to be. And I don't tell stories well because I forget things. But one of Sarah's roommate was talking about how at her job, one of the rules is that you can't dye your hair an unnatural color, and you can't let your roots show.
Now, let me paint a picture of the state of my hair, here. A few inches of my natural hair color (roots), which is dark blonde. Then, sections of either black or red hair. Nevermind the gradations between. So, I'm concerned with this policy, and say "Well, what if you don't like your hair color anymore? Then what?? I mean... look at ME!
And shit, Sarah just thought that was the funniest thing in the world and bust out laughing. I don't know what it was, but hell who cares! Good times. Her roommates are awesome. I'll be so sad when they all graduate! :( Which is this term... wahh.
But, you know there's always the chance for finding new people to hang out with. And of course, I'll still see Sarah once in a while since she DOES live in Naperville. We'll have to catch up on all the random drama that happens to us!
I have to get to bed soon. But I wanted to post. Cause I was in such a happy mood tonight. Haha I have another short story,.. I was taking a shower around 7:30pm and all of a sudden I hear someone yelling "RACHEL!" and finally I turn off the water and scream "WHAT??"
"IT'S ME SARAH! MY MOM BROUGHT ME CUPCAKES, DO YOU WANT CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?"
"UHH.... VANILLA"
"OKAY I'LL LEAVE IT OUTSIDE YOUR DOOR!"
"COOL... THANK YOU...."
and I proceeded to finish showering. And then later, when I was at the front desk and we were telling her roommates about it, I said "Yeah I'm sorry I didn't come to the door, but I was kind of soapy....... and naked." (My other big laugh of the night. Whoo! I'm on a roll).
But like I said, bed. Sleep. I have to register for classes tomorrow morning, I have to wake up earlier than usual. Yyyup.